When Your Happiness Depends On Others
Reflect for a moment on the happiness that exists (or doesn’t) in your life. What does this happiness depend on? From you? From others? One mistake we make that makes us feel miserable is relying on others to achieve our happiness. If others aren’t happy, neither are we, but it shouldn’t work that way!
Do you identify with this? And with the following points?
make nice for others
In life, we always try to make things beautiful for others. For what purpose? Preventing people from speaking ill of us, preventing fights, feeling bad for feeling guilty… Anyway, whenever we can, we’ll bow our heads in order to stay in line and not create conflicts.
But this is not quite the case. If differences arise between two people and this gives rise to conflict, don’t feel bad! Think that both of you should respect the other’s opinion, and if someone is reactive to that, it’s not worthy of making you feel bad.
Your fear is feeling guilty. Do you need to lower your head so that these conflicts do not arise and thus be “happy”? Your happiness is in yourself and you should not hold back for fear of others’ unhappiness. Your happiness will come when you start giving yourself the value you deserve.
you need to learn to be happy
When you depend on others, there will come a time when you will find that you are not happy. Really, you’re looking for other people’s happiness, not yours. You’re looking for the comfort of avoiding a confrontation, the joy of being okay with everyone…but actually, you’re in constant concern to keep it all under control.
Stop being vulnerable to the opinion of others! You need to believe in yourself, in your possibilities, and stop relying on approval, on how others want to see you. You have no reason to control everything, you don’t have to please everyone. This is impossible to achieve and you will only get frustrated.
Accept that the happiness of others shouldn’t be your own, that there will always be someone who won’t “hit” you, and that’s something you can’t help! And I say more, learn to be happy with rejection, criticism, conflict… Think of yourself first, not others. Be selfish for once; this is not wrong!
Your happiness is a matter of attitude
At first, facing this situation is not easy. Through inertia, you will continue to try to please, be in control of situations, and avoid annoyance. But this needs to end and takes a lot of effort. You must first be aware of your addictive situation and then start taking action.
When you begin to appreciate yourself as you deserve and understand that your happiness depends only on you, it will be time to react to the things that you previously prevented from happening. If someone is against you or tries to redirect your life your way, react! Besides having an adrenaline rush, you’ll feel great!
You also need to answer “What does it mean to be happy?”, because for each person happiness is in different things. For this reason, we cannot let it depend on others, as it is something personal! Maybe you’re afraid to find your own happiness, or maybe you don’t want to take on this responsibility. In any case, only you can find your own happiness.
What does happiness mean to you? This is the first question you need to answer. But don’t make the mistake of thinking about someone else. No, now it’s time for you to think of yourself, you are the first thing. Be responsible and find your happiness.
If you depend on others to be happy, we hope that you can learn, little by little, to seek your own happiness, without needing anyone. It is very easy to leave this responsibility to others, because being unhappy is easy! Start changing this today.
