What Is The Secret Of Happy Relationships?
Isn’t humanity curious? There are so many people going through life, racing against the clock, immersed in the routine, busy doing thousands of things and, in their free time, they are in front of the TV, connected to Facebook, or surrounded by people, noise and numb by alcohol and drugs . In this flood of what to be and not to be, the essential is lost, which is not outside, just inside.
It is necessary to start at home
Loneliness can be hopeless for some people. These, in order to be always accompanied, sacrifice the quality of their relationships. Often, this fear of loneliness just reflects that deep down there is a fear of getting in touch with your innermost emotions, as they can turn out to be unpleasant or painful. It is preferable, then, to be distracted or to live only external things.
But if emotional needs are not listened to and met, if we do not accept ourselves unconditionally, with our strengths and weaknesses, we will walk through life wearing a mask, pretending to be what we are not in order to gain acceptance from others; acceptance that we deny ourselves.
The human being is not born an emotional zombie. Babies don’t choose their emotions, they simply feel and express them. During the socialization process the child can unfortunately be ignored, hurt, ridiculed or abused. Therefore, the only recourse the child has is to bury the pain experienced in his unconscious, because he still depends on others to feel worthy of love and respect.
Upon reaching adulthood, it is imperative that a person take responsibility for their emotional health and take care of healing their wounds, as well as filling the needs of their inner child. Otherwise, she will live an internal void and try to fill it with superficial relationships.
So, our primary task is to learn to see, love and value what is most precious to us: our essence. The more we learn to love ourselves, the greater the desire to share our love with others, for authentic love is expansive in nature. It’s impossible to stop this expansive wave, so it’s inevitable to want to share that love with others, not out of emptiness and mask, but out of fullness and authenticity.
happy relationships
The reason for a relationship to exist is to learn, grow, love, have fun and mutually enjoy the company. Ultimately, our real mission in this world is to expand our capacity to love, both ourselves and others. When we understand and live for this mission, we discover that loving authentically and unconditionally is the greatest treasure we can find.
There is no luxury, pleasure, achievement, possessions or riches that can replace the fullness produced by true unconditional love. However, we need to start by loving and accepting ourselves. Loving yourself gives security and confidence to each member of a loving relationship. Rather than trying to get the other’s love and even demanding it, they share the love they have for themselves. Ironically, they are giving to each other what they have always wanted for themselves but were not able to get before.
Self-abandonment and self-rejection are some of the biggest causes of failure among couples. So learning to love yourself really helps to heal relationships. Loving is the most wonderful thing there is, but you can’t give what you don’t feel. Until we learn to love ourselves, we won’t be able to love others.
