You Are What You Do, Not What You Say You Will Do

It’s always been easier to create expectations than fulfill them, so we’re more used to odds hanging in the air than certainties. In the end, what happens is that we tend to forget that we are what we do, not what we say we will do: you are what you do, and the intentions are just decorative.

As you act, you leave a kind of trail around you that can reach others or reverberate in your near future: a reaction or attitude to a situation can make a difference. In other words, the good heart you have needs to be in tune with your movements and your thoughts: what you say conveys, but what you do makes sense.

The frustration of expectations

We love expectations and, in a way, they are inspiring to get what we want: they are built as impulses and are filled with our dreams of continuing to grow or making others happy. In this way, expectations become the starting point of authenticity because they are born from the depths of each person, but also from fragility and frustration.

Without realizing it, many of the daily thoughts we have are expectations or dreams that feed on the promises of others or the personal hopes placed on them: “he promised that we would go out to celebrate and now he can’t”, “I’ll certainly do super well in this interview, i’m super prepared”, “he’s hoping to win the cd i showed on his birthday, but i forgot to buy it”, etc. These could be commonplace examples of what we are saying.

In cases where promises and expectations are not accompanied by the effort to make them a reality, they become useless, as they only create disappointment, sadness or irritation: the purposes are not absolute truths and the error lies in acting as if they were. In this sense, one can only take a fact without fear of breaking it when it has already been fully fulfilled.

You are what you do: your attitudes define you

This does not mean that it doesn’t matter what we have inside, but that attitudes give us away regardless of what we want to make believe with words.

You are what you do because if your heart is good, your relationships will see it in the small details. On the contrary, if it’s bad, the promises and expectations you generate can’t hide it.

In the end we all have three personalities: what we are, what we think we are, and what others think we are; it is necessary to try that the three live in harmony. If we say that we are going to do a certain thing and we don’t do it, what happens is that the three personalities clash and negative emotions arise.

So where are the good intentions?

Good intentions are fundamental, since without them ends would hardly exist. It’s good to have the purpose of constantly surpassing yourself, like at work, where the goals we set are so important.

However, having the purpose of reaching a goal does not necessarily lead to it. Think about it: how many of your New Year’s resolutions have you reached in these last few months? Probably many were just at ease. Having positive purposes gives us vitality and adrenaline, but it is necessary to accompany them with action, with movement.